azure_doris's Xanga

Saturday, November 07, 2009

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 15:17:37 GMT

a bit disappointed

well

as always

when you know more

ya will feel more disappointed

i should let go

cox all of us are human

human are selfish

n dishonest

today is angela bday

happy bithday angela

hope you are doing well

somehow it is not a bad thing to leave

cox sometimes people are suffering in the society

which is full of suspect

lies

and dishonesty

and unfairness

Marin graduation

good for her

i hope i can have mine next yr

i like the flowers

it looks good

i prefer pinky one

rather than the yellow

i dunno why

anyway

hope things going well for my frds

Thursday, November 05, 2009

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 09:19:09 GMT

life comes with a blank paper

since i was born

i come without anything

after that

i started to have frds

schoolmates

neighbors

lovers

colleagues

the blank paper becomes more and more colorful

and fill with different kinda emotional and languages

when i m thinking about the past

i should think about

originally i was born with nothing

and now

even i lose one of the things

it cannot claim to be a lost

cox i have not owned it in day 1

even my life

is not owned by me

i hate the feeling of fluffy

unhappiness

and sadness

however

this is part of my life

well

i dunno what i can do or what i should do

except learning to let things go

start to plan for my next step

hope i can get it

i dunno how long will it be

however

i will start the do the research

well

i cannot remain the status quo

in fact

i should do what my feeling lead to do

watched a movie before

the woman in the movie said

there is a place of our body

once we put the needle into it

we can forget all the bad memory

is it true?

i really wanna know

i hate myself

cox my memory is too good

esp for the bad and sad experiences

can music heal/

can movie heal/

i dunno

maybe

well

choking

until one day

cannot breath

things will end and return to the beginning

my dear angela

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 15:22:06 GMT

angela my frd

yr bday is coming

where are you now

i feel very painful this yr

6 yrs?

7 yrs?

i really forgot

i really dun wanna remember

the day ya leave me forever

angela

i m too weak now

i lost my soul

sry for that i have promised ya

i will be tough and strong

will nt like a gal ya met 10 yrs ago

only cry when i dunno what i should do

what can i do angela

where are ya

i really miss ya

when i can see ya again

can i go to heaven and meet ya again

plsdun leave me alone angela

my feeling is so strong

angela my frd

where r ya....

Sunday, November 01, 2009

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 21:58:19 GMT

my life is like a puzzle

i m trying hard to find the missing pieces

however

it is not easy

really not easy

cox i always find the wrong one

i dunno how many times i can try

the feeling is fluffy and anxious

sometimes the wrong trial make me miss some chances

sometimes the wrong piece before maybe the right one just i dunno

finally i find out

there is no right and wrong

actually i m the one who define it is suit for my life or not

however

sometimes when i discover that

it is too late

now i just like running or walking in a labyrinth

i cannot find my way

hope this kinda situation will not last for long

these days

seem i already lost my target and goal

i m not that taregt oriented anymore

well

maybe it is a good thing for myself

i dunno

just let go

trying to reach you

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 16:49:25 GMT

i love this song very much

the melody is good

the lyric is good

no doubt

i got a number on my wall

someday soon i'm gonna call

been trying reach you for a long, long time

been trying reach you but i could not find a line

finding an easy way to break your heart

finding the hardest part is leaving

finding an easy way to break your heart

finding the hardest part is leaving

i got a number on my wall

and this time you know i want more

it takes a while before you really know what's right

it takes a while before you know what's right

finding an easy way to break your heart

finding the hardest part is leaving

finding an easy way to break your heart

finding the hardest part is leaving

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 13:58:16 GMT

Finally got sick - feeling is good ...

fever, headache, runny nose

long time have not suffered like that

thanks for Mr Sunny

next week i will play tennis at nite time...

sick is good

but cannot be that often

Suddenly remember what F told me

even i have a bf or not

or even husband

i should not rely on him

cox only myself is the most reliable

well

i dunno

really dunno what will happen next in my life

ABCDEFG...

well

which alpha is the most suitable to me?

i dunno

better go to bed again..

the medicine is strong

and the feeling is so nice with the cooling pad....

my head and body still burning....

if i feel better

i will go swimming before movie.

well..

need more sport to burn my energy

the message

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 16:52:17 GMT

watch the message tonite with B

good one

before that

i went to buy sth for the camping thing weekend with B and J

well...hope it will be a nice one...long time no camping

back to the movie

i really like Ms Chow

she is a super good actress

no matter for what kinda character

she can handle it very well

the story is good

can see that the director has put much time on it

really a good movie to recommend

and I like the music as well

damn good

tmr will watch 500days of summer with C

hope it is ok

and i think so

cox i like the actor very much

and i bet the songs will be super good for this movie

let c

need to sleep

i m a bit exhausted these days

i hope i can burn out my energy every day

then i will not have time to think too much

though it is difficult

i know

will God give me a chance

will God give me what i wish

i hope so

anyway

let keep the fingers crossed

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 15:55:25 GMT

Things gone

life must go on

no matter it is good or bad

it is uncontrollable

my feeling is

i was built by 1000 pcs of LEGO system bricks

with different colors

but i have been splited into pieces

some pieces are lost

and so i cannot be re-assembled completely

i dunno what i can do

i try my best to get them back

but always cannot match

they are not belong to me

what happen in my life

i dunno

really dunno

i hope i will know one day

turning 29 next month

i hope i can get what i wish

i hope

really hope

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 04:45:15 GMT

i dunno what happen on me recently

seem like too many negative power in my body

running and burning

i need to release this kinda energy

so plan to swim today

where is my bullet proof

where is my life

Monday, September 21, 2009

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 16:05:15 GMT

怪事年年有

今年特別多

又一次proof到

呢個世界係無天理的

有無搞錯

what the fuxk.....